Change of Plans

Today... heard the girl coughing in the morning...although she was already coughing slightly yesterday.

The boy has been sick since Friday... cough and cold. Got from school. Again.

We were planning to go down to Seremban today. To visit the in-laws.

Cannot go already. Poor Ryan. Disappointed. Has been looking forward to see his cousins since 2 weeks ago.

Was planning to put up the Christmas tree too today. No sun. Cloudy day. Need to sun it first. But having second thoughts in putting up the tree. Coz wouldn't want my present cockroach family to have an extra place to venture to. Perhaps spray the tree with citronella... would that ward off the roaches???

Another full day staying at home. Sigh. Sometimes its tiring staying at home. I rather go out. But I have so many things to do here. Lots of tidying up.

Little girl is sleeping now next to me on her bouncing chair with the pacifier in her mouth. Hubs is cooking his own brunch (smells like fried egg) and the boy is playing with his puzzles and toys.

This is a stay-in Sunday feeling...

My Christmas Shopping List

Best part about Christmas is shopping for presents for the family and friends. Especially the kids ( my sisters kids and mine). But getting presents for the kids can also be the hardest since kids now have everything...

I plan to get Ryan a car set.... either a police station or maybe a fire station. Not sure. Need to make a trip to Toys R Us soon. He also asked me to get him a pair of sunglasses.

As for Allyson... I guess clothes would be the most practical for her. Or a development toy. I like Lamaze toys. Wait for sale.

Normally every year, my sisters and I would give ideas what to get for each others children. Coz we wouldn't want to get a present and the children already have that.

As for my father... maybe something for the kitchen???

I am thinking to get for my in-laws each a nice king size bedsheet... and vouchers too. See lah... depending on my budget.

Ryan and his cousins in Kong Kong's house for Christmas last year

My Christmas Wish List

I can't believe that Christmas is about one month from now. Time to plan my Christmas present list and also my Christmas lunch for my in-laws. Although I am not much in the Christmas mood yet, better start planning early coz the days will surely fly by very quickly.

So... what would I like for Christmas...???

(Scratch head)

1. Photo frames to put the kids pictures in it

2. Sports shoes - for exercise

3. A silver pendant and chain (from Perlini)

4. A food processor (Phillips brand) for blending food for Allyson

5. Clarks shoes ( saw these Mary Janes yesterday... nice!)

6. More baking equipment???

7. A new fragrance (some thing light and feminine... last time I bought a perfume was like 2 years ago...)

So... hubs... take your pick... which one of the above that would be sitting under my Christmas tree??? Hint! Hint!

New tastes

Got this Pringles Soft shell crab chips last week... couldn't resist not trying this flavour. Was suppose to keep to my 'Healthy eating' motto...but what the heck... a few pieces of sodium-filled chips won't harm me, right?

Anyway, it tasted okay. Only okay but very very saltish. Needed to drink a whole cup of water after that. Had to limit myself to 3-4 pieces each time. But hubs enjoyed it.

Sometimes its nice to have a change once in a while. Do something from the norm. So what did I do? I bought Nissin noodles yesterday!!! haha! Great big deal, right? Well, for one... I would NEVER spend RM7.50 on a pack of instant noodles. But well, never say NEVER!

I got the japanese flavoured noodles that came with seaweed. Had it for lunch today.

Any good?

For about RM1.50 per packet as compared to RM0.80 for Maggi Mee... I would say it is worth the money lah! More tasty and the portions are bigger. Also more unsual flavours. After having eaten Maggi Mee all my life and exposing myself to flavours like Chicken, Curry and Assam Laksa... of course seeing different flavours from Nissin is refreshing!

Hurray for change!!

What's on my mind?

• Check out Adam Lambert's first single... totally amazing! Knew he won't let me down.

• It has been raining almost everyday. Heavy rain too. Hard for clothes to dry. Miss the sun.

• Got a new cot bumper for Allyson. From World of Cartoons. Made a mistake. Too big. Can't decide whether to keep or return.
  

• Had quite a terrible lunch today. Macaroni with tuna, apples, raisins and brocolli.
  

• Spent RM4.80 on a 8 Grain loaf of bread yesterday. Keeping up with my 'healthy living' mission!

• Have a new template for this blog. And just started another new blog just for the kids photos.

• Been taking Hypocol since last week. 2 capsules twice a day.

• Hubs and I are declaring war against the cockroach colony multiplying in our home. (With Baygon and Combat)

• Need a wardrobe makeover badly!

• Darn! Got to work tomorrow.
  

• Got the boy his first watch... Ben 10 watch! And he doesn't even like the cartoon.

• Halloween is tomorrow. Bah... !

• I want to eat chocolates. Lots of them sitting in the fridge!

• Miss my baby girl...

• My baby girl has a flat head.
  

• Should I go down to Klang this weekend?

• What should I cook for dinner today?

• Totally afraid of heavy vehicles on the road now... after the sudden tyre explosion from a neighbouring truck just directly next to me!

I am bored!

I am too lazy to write a post... so I will just load some pictures.

The other day, I was feeling bored and decided to take pictures around my house. Just as a reminder to me on how my house looked like on this particular day 13th October 2009.

My messy fridge



Ryan's collection of books over 3 years



Time to throw this potato away

My messy kitchen

My messy living room

Naughty boy napping


Neglected plant


Favourite washing liquid... smells heavenly!
Sometimes I want to bathe in it!

Heath Check Failed!

I am so worried and upset!

My full blood report came back yesterday and it was NOT good news!

I have been having elevated blood cholesterol for the past 5 years already... or since I started doing my annual blood screening. But it has been marginal. I was totally shocked ( and felt slightly faint!) when I saw my cholesterol readings yesterday.

Here is the summary:

2009
Total cholesterol 6.3 mmol/L
HDL 1.5 mmol/L
LDL 4.3 mmol/L
Triglycerides 1.2 mmol/L

2007 2006
5.6 5.2
1.49 1.33
3.7 3.55
0.8 0.7

2005
6.0
1.9
3.7
1.4

I didn't do in 2008 coz I was pregnant at that time. According to my gynae, the readings wouldn't be accurate.

Looks like 2009 is the worst year although 2005 was pretty high too. Wonder why it was so high at that time? Anyway, whatever it is... my arteries are pretty clogged up now. I can picture all the fatty deposits narrowing my arteries.

First thing that came to my mind was... what can I do now?
No.1 - Change my diet?
Ah yo. Right now I am so skinny already and I eat pretty healthily. I hardly eat all those fatty pork and red meat. Even seafood is a once a month affair. I do eat eggs but only about 3 times a week and that is 2 eggs shared by 3 people. I can't imagine how it can affect my cholesterol level. Fried food too is a very rare treat to me. My favourite most high cholesterol food would be duck rice but I only indulge in that once in 2 weeks the most. My breakfast is also pretty simple but I guess eating kaya and peanut butter isn't very healthy if it is an everyday affair.

After evaluating my eating pattern, I guess I don't eat much fatty foods but I also don't eat very healthily. So, I have to incorporate more vegetables in my diet, cut down on my meat intake, eat more fish (which we hardly do) and for breakfast, a bowl of oats every morning.
I suppose I can start like that first and see how it goes after 3 months.

No.2 - Exercise?
Okay... I admit that I don't exercise at all! But I don't lead a sedentary lifestyle either. I am on my feet for almost the entire day. Either doing housechores or running around here and there getting stuff for the house. I find myself rushing and my heartbeat beating rapidly most of the time coz there isn't enough time in a day to do everything.
So my plan is... once dropping Ryan at school.. to run around the park near my house at least 3 times a week. Possible? Need new running shoes first!

No.3 - Supplements?
First thing I would do when I get to work is get a pack of Hypocol. It is red yeast rice extract in capsule form and it helps lower cholesterol level similar to the statins. Minus the side effects apparently. I have many customers who take this supplements as a subsitute to the statin groups... and i have seen cases that work and some that don't. I will give it a try for 3 months.

No.4 - Family History of Cardiovascular Disease (CVD)
My mother died at the age of 60 because of stroke. My dad has diabetes, high BP and cholesterol too. So, in some ways, I don't think I can run away from my fate of having CVD. It is a matter of confronting it and dealing with it.

This recent cholesterol reading probably has shaken me most coz I feel I must take more responsibility for my health now since now I have 2 children and I am not getting any younger. 33 years old still very young and if I don't take care now, I don't think I may live to see my grandchildren! Seriously.

Look at my hands!

This is how the state of my hands were during the 2 weeks I had to wear latex disposable gloves when Ryan and I had HFMD!

Worst than an old woman hand. ( Have to enlarge to see)

It is definitely the powder in those gloves that makes the skin so sensitive. Next time must get those powder-free gloves.

Had bought this Neutrogena Hand Cream a month back. Didn't really like the consistency of the cream. Very thick and oily. Hard to apply. But had no choice... coz the condition of my hands were so bad. Helped a bit. Better than not applying anything. Anyone know of any good hand cream out there?

I give thanks

Although I have not been an active Christian for years... God answered my prayers.

And I am so thankful to HIM.

He heard my cries.

I cried for my children. I didn't want them to suffer. I asked HIM to protect them.

And HE did!

Ryan's 3rd time of HFMD was rather mild although he suffered discomfort in his mouth for 3 days. He didn't have fever this time around.

Allyson was the innocent one. I was so afraid for her. I totally didn't want the virus to get to her. She is too young to endure that kind of pain and discomfort. I did all I could in my power to protect her. And I left it to God.

At one point... 5 days after Ryan got his attack, she started to refuse to drink her milk. I cried. I thought I had failed and she was starting to get the infection. For one whole day, she only drank 2 feeds. I cried everytime she refused. I got angry. Angry with people. Angry with myself. Then, I asked HIM again ... please... please...let Allyson drink her milk. And the next day, in the early morning... she took her full feed.

God is a forgiving God. HE still heard my cries eventhough I have turned away for so many years. HE knows my heart is pure and sincere... and I love my children with all my heart and soul.

Thank you GOD!

Disastrous Bake!

It was second day of Hari Raya.

Since we couldn't go anywhere due to the H1N1 pandemic, I had planned to make some cupcakes. Took out the some recipe books... flipped thru... and saw this recipe in the Australian Women's Weekly cookery book on pies and cakes. Looked pretty easy. Took out the hand mixer... first time using it...normally use a wooden spoon to mix the ingredients.

Everything was easy and simple.

But to my disappointment... the end result was yucky. I did modify the recipe here and there and added raisins for Ryan. Maybe it wasn't meant to have raisins. Turned out so hard, dry and dense.

Made 12 cupcakes and there are still 6 sitting in the fridge. That explains how scrumptous it is!

Say farewell to Breast Milk

I am officially 'milk-less' already.

If I squeeze hard enough, I get little drops of milk amounting to probably 20 ml after 30 mins of expressing.

So sad, huh???

All the mothers out there who are blessed with an abundance of breast milk, lucky you!!!

More Free Time

Ever since sending Allyson to the babysitter at the beginning of this month, I have had much more time to spend with Ryan and myself. Eventhough it may be just a couple of hours. Evidently from the number of posts that I have written in this week.

If I don't work, I will send Allyson around 11 something and pick her up around 5 something. Unless I have some errands to run... then I may send her a little bit earlier. I still feel so guilty whenever I look at the babysitter's house from my house. Knowing that Allyson is just right there and I am not with her ( Babysitter's house is right opposite my house).

But I know this is the choice I have made against having a maid. And I am very much happier with this choice if compared to having a maid. So I guess some things have to be sacrificed in order for me to have a less stressful life. I tell myself it is not the quantity of time I spend with Allyson... it is the quality. So I pay someone to take care of her while I have time for the house and Ryan. If not, I am just spreading myself thin. Haha.. that is what I tell myself to feel guilt free. Am I a bad mother for thinking like this?

Today I finally had the time to collect Allyson's Mykids from Shah Alam. And then I dropped by Tesco. Was 20 minutes late fetching Ryan from school. Got home... bathe the boy and cooked our lunch (Broccoli with mushrooms and pork, scrambled eggs with tomatoes) and finally wash Allyson's clothes. I have some time to do blogging and read my book before fetching Mei Mei. (Am reading 'Remember Me?' by Sophie Kinsella now... very funny and interesting)

The day just passes so fast. With a blink of an eye... it is already evening. Hubby is going to nag me coz even now that Allyson is at the babysitter, looks like I am more lazy in cleaning the house as compared to when I was taking care of her full time. Probably coz I using my free time to blog and read now.

Good day

After a few tiring days in a row... seems like today is turning 'not-so-bad' so far. (Ahem! Better not speak too soon, huh?)

Well, if I can be sitting at the computer at 3.00pm in the afternoon and both the kids are sleeping, I guess I will deem it as 'okay' day.

What's the difference?

I put Allyson to sleep upstairs in her cot. Whenever she napped today, I quickly put her in her room upstairs. So I can do all the house chores downstairs. When Ryan came back from school, I quickly put her in her room too. Luckily she nodded off in the car. So I could cook our lunch and feed the boy. Then, I quickly bathe the boy. Noticed that I wrote a lot of 'quickly'. Well, I guess everything I do has to be really fast and noiseless. Don't want to wake up the 'princess'!

Anyhow, she will wake up soon for her feed.

Note: Allyson has been sleeping through the night since last week. Except for a few days in between. The difficult part is getting her to sleep. She is very sensitive and every time her head touches the pillow, she wakes up. Two nights ago, it took me 3 hours to get her to sleep. After all the rocking and singing that didn't work, she ended up nodding off on her own while I was checking her diapers!!!

Bye Bye Breast Milk

I am about to surrender...put out the white flag.

My breastmilk is almost down to nil now. I know it is my fault.

I only express twice a day now... can't help it. Really can't find the time to sit down and pump. I am like squeezing every last drop I can get right now. I get only 1.5oz now each time. Some times when I am really tired and stressed, I get 1 oz only. So pathetic. I really find some satisfaction knowing that Allyson is getting some form of natural nutrition from me. Even by drinking such little amount.

Sorry, Allyson!

First Indulgence after Green Light

So what was the first thing I went for after the one-month confinement?




Yep... I finally got my coffee fix after 9 months of abstaining from it!

Did it taste great?






Actually, nope! It didn't give my any 'rasa' ! I was drinking as if it was like water. But now, I am back to drinking it every morning. Must have one cup. Don't dare go more than one cup.. in case it may keep Allyson awake!

Zombie!

\
I am a walking zombie!

Well, welcome to motherhood all over again!!!

Haha! Whenever I am kept awake by Allyson in the wee hours of the morning, I think of the other mothers in my position right at that moment. Rocking the wide-eyed baby to sleep... getting her to relax for the past one hour... quietly putting her in her crib... and 5 seconds later... her eyes opens!!! And she CRIES!!!

I remember that was the case with Ryan too. But I think Allyson is a more fussy sleeper. But only during the night. Somehow, in the day time, she sleeps easier.

Today is Day No.6 with Allyson alone. The routine has already been established. I still get 'kan-cheong' when she doesn't burp after her feed. I still get 'kan-cheong' when she sleeps past her feeding time during the day.

Last night, I only managed to sleep at 4am. I was so exhausted coz Allyson kept on waking up after I put her in her bed. She was wailing and crying very loudly and uncontrollably at one point... I got worried! But after giving her the pacifier, she quietened down. But when the pacifier came out, she cried again! I thought it may be wind. But it seems okay now. I just attribute it to she was tired and was getting very agitated! When she woke up again at 4 something crying, I just cried to her and begged her to sleep coz I couldn't carry her anymore. I left her in the crib and stroked her forehead and she finally fell asleep! So so relieved!!!

ok.... should be getting rest now since she is napping too. Got to do some housework too. Ah.. will do it slightly later.

Look at that tomato cheeks!!!

Must keep healthy!

Oh no... my nose is starting to get itchy and runny! Hope it is just some allergic reaction! Been coughing today. Ryan has been complaining of phlegm since 2 days ago.

Don't want to fall sick when Pui Yit goes home. More worried about the baby. Need to be TOP form.

Better get some Vitamin C effervescent tablets !

21st day of Confinement

Today is the 3rd week since Allyson was born.

I am filled with lots of anxiety right now. Don't know why my mood is like a roller coaster. When I look at Allyson, I smile and my heart is filled with love and joy for this little bundle. Then, a minute later, when Ryan gets irritating and just being plain right naughty, I will start to yell at him and even give him a whacking or two! I normally don't get so irate so easily. I normally don't beat him so easily. But yesterday, somehow I was very very short fused! And I let it out on my boy!

Totally feel bad. I looked at him last night as Ryan slept next to me... I just felt so guilty and my eyes welled up with tears. I love him so very much and I don't want to hurt him.

I know what I am feeling is the post natal hormones making me like an emotional sap!
I got to take control of my emotions and don't let this post-natal mood swings get the better of me. Hubby doesn't really understand too... so I guess I got to get over it by myself. Make myself busy. I guess.

So, now... i have given myself a little project. To collect some yummy home-cooked recipes from blogs.. categorize them according to different types of food...eg. chicken, pork, soups, beancurd...and then it will be easier for me to refer to them next month. I am contemplating to stop the caterer but then again, I don't think I can handle cooking for 3 adults and looking after a newborn and toddler without any help. But the caterer's food is getting boring ( 2nd month now only). Another option is to reduce the number of heads ( from 3 to 2) and just top up a dish or two every night. Maybe will do that. Also, I plan to list out the menu for the whole week.. so that I can plan what I want to get from the market on a weekly basis.

Being everyday at home... the pui yit and I follow the 5pm TV8 chinese serial...'Shining Stars' or is it 'Shooting Stars'... something like that. Then at 6pm, she follows the AEC Korean serial 'Married with six children'...then at 7pm, we both watch 'Heart of Greed' at TV8 again.Don't know whether she should be watching so much TV... but I feel bad for her. Anyway, the baby is sleeping around that time... and she does cook around 7.30pm for me. Watching these serials are making the days pass really really quickly! (the actor Raymond Lam from 'Heart of Greed' is kinda of dishy!!!)

My breast milk is still the same. Not increase in volume. And that is adding to my anxiety. Sigh. Why other mothers don't seem to have the problem getting milk??? Even skinny slim friends.. have lots of milk being churned out. I must be doing some thing wrong. Still trying to be patient. I pump 4 times a day. Know it is not enough. So trying to increase to 5 times a day since Tuesday. Still don't see much increment in volume. Still getting around 1.5 oz to 2 oz each time. Allyson has stopped suckling on my breast since the 1st week. She gets all red like a tomato and cries in such distress when I put her to my breast that I don't want to force her. Maybe I shouldn't have given up so fast.

Look at that cheeky face. Allyson certainly looks like her
kor kor at that age

My 2 lovely kids...joy of my life

Half Way Through Confinement

Today is my 14th day after delivery.

Pui Yit will be going back in another 2 more weeks.

Sob! Sob! I have gotten really spoilt and contented in having someone in the house to help me. It is nice too having company. I feel safe and someone mothering me!

Have to admit that I haven't been a good 'mummy' during this confinement. I always forget to wear my slippers and socks. I wash the plates and cups eventhough she will be yelling at me to just put it in the sink. Been touching alot of cold water. I washed my hair after the 5th day of delivery. I bathed after coming back from the hospital. I went out to Tesco one week after delivery. I drove and sent Ryan to school 5 days after delivery.

Just worried of the 'after' effects... like bone pain, back pain etc. if I don't take care now. But somehow, what about those mothers who don't have maids or confinement ladies??? Surely they too have to run the household right after childbirth... whether they like it or not.

I guess I shouldn't be so stubborn... since I have some 'help' for a month, I should utilise it, right?

Just because I feel fine and dandy now, doesn't mean few years down the road, I won't have any bodyaches attributed from not taking care after childbirth?

Allyson is awake now. She had a nice long sleep since 7.30am... will go and play with her now before I fetch her Kor-Kor from school!

Breast feeding worries

Allyson is 12 days old today.

As I am typing on the keyboard now, she is sleeping in the playpen downstairs being accompanied by the Pui Yit.

I have to admit that I haven't really been hands-on in taking care of Allyson since she was born. I guess I will let the Pui Yit handle Allyson until maybe one week before she has to leave. Kind of nervous on how to burp her and bathe her when I am all alone. Right now, I feel so safe coz I have some one experienced who knows how to look after babies. I have forgotten all those ways on how to take care of baby when Ryan was born. I guess it will come back to me when I really have to face it.

Allyson is almost on 100% formula feed at the moment. I know I haven't really emphasised purely on breastfeeding. The first few days when she was born, I tried putting her to the breast to suckle. But after several days, I gave up forcing her to suckle coz she was always struggling and crying when I put her to the breast. Maybe I shouldn't have gave up so fast. I felt so bad pushing her. My nipples were also not very easy to latch on and she got frustrated after awhile. So now, I am pumping out my milk. Now into Day 12,my milk supply has remained stagnant ... not increasing. Worried when will I get the let-down. Each time I pump, I only get about 40-50ml of milk... and I try to pump every 3-4 hours. I don't pump at night. Guess the frequency of extracting is probably one of the reasons why the milk supply is low. Should try letting her suckle again. Not sure whether she will still take to the breast after so many days of not suckling.

Hai.. worry worry worry. I really want to give her breast milk. I want her to be a strong baby with natural antibodies. I guess I just don't want to depend on synthetically produced milk.
But no point stressing myself about it if my breastmilk really doesn't really come in. As long as I know I tried and gave my best...

Allyson looking contented

Let the countdown begin!

Today is Sunday...

Due date on Thursday...

That means 5 days to go...

Woke up to pee... now couldn't go back to sleep!

Thinking what to pack in the hospital bag.

All I can think of is ...

For mummy :

Toothbrush
Toothpaste
Facial wash
Face towel
Hand wash
2 pair of pants
2 pair of tops
Underwear
Maternity pads
A book


For baby :

Diapers
Mittens and booties
A blanket
A hat for her head
Some face towels
(Should I take milk bottles too???)


Will pack by today.

Tomorrow some people will come to do the laminate flooring for the baby room. Air-conditioner is already up since last Friday. MIL will come on Wednesday night. Hubby will fetch her from Seremban.

(There is an irritating mosquito trying to suck my blood now. So far, he already bit me twice on the leg already!)

My big baby playing with my baby

Connection problem

Hai... just when i want to write things down, my computer connection has to go kaput! Don't know what is wrong. Very slow. Cannot access internet. Always hang.

So, using my sister's computer at her house.

Well, one more week before delivery. Still doing all the usual daily routine. Shopping, sending Ryan to school, cleaning the house etc. Stopped working already. Get breathless easily. Rather bored at home. Nothing to do. No cooking too. Only cook Ryan and my lunch in the afternoon.

So afraid I forgot to do something. Everything is prepared but still messy.

OK off to One Utama now...

Counting the days...

Hai... another scorching hot day!

Hubby will be coming back late and I will be alone with the boy till late at night. Gets rather lonely sometimes.

My tummy is huge now. Everything I wear is so tight. It is getting really near to the due date now. I am actually half excited and half nervous. I guess I am 85% prepared already. Only thing is to fix the air-cond in the baby room and downstairs. Clothes and essential needs I think pretty much got everything already. Just bought the baby mobile from Tesco today ( saw in Babyland at RM39.90 ) but it was priced at RM35.00. So faster got it. And I got some baby clothes ( Anakku) brand for RM5.00 a top. It is nice to hunt for bargains!!! Feel very rewarding!

I also got some clothes for my confinement already. Some big baggy comfortable tops and bottoms to wear for the entire month that I will be house bound. Also at a bargain at Brands Outlet!! I am going out to the shopping malls at least twice a week now... enjoying my freedom as much as possible and to get as many things prepared!

It is getting harder to walk now. I really look like a penguin waddling away. My ankles are swollen now. At least this time, my ankles only got swollen during the last month of pregnancy. With Ryan, I remember they got swollen pretty early. Sleeping also is getting more and more 'san-foo'!

At the moment, I am cherishing all the moments that we can have mother-father-son time with Ryan. Coz once baby comes out, I don't think we even have time to sit around with the boy and listen to all his stories and guide him with his activities! But I hope hubby and I can learn to divide our time between baby and Ryan... so that the boy will still feel loved and not neglected!

One more month...

Wow.. i cannot believe how time can just fly by like that. You would think that 9 months is a long damn time... but it surely is surreal that it feels like a bat of an eyelid.

I guess the last trimester of pregnancy is 'memang' like that... coz with all the preparation, anxiety and planning...that will take alot of time. Every night now I go to bed thinking about my plans and what I have to do. Think only... but nothing seems to be materialising.

By next month same date, if baby is obedient, she will come out on the due date. I am planning to ask doc to induce her by 4th July. But I think it is a Saturday.

I definitely feel heavier now. Walk also look like a penguin. The only thing difficult is when I get up from a sitting or lying position. Somehow hurts at the groin area. Normal I guess. Other than that, I can still spend the half a day shopping at One U and not feel tired after that.
At this moment, still haven't decided on a name of baby. Chinese name totally still clueless. That is hubby's responsibility. I want a simple name and yet not too common. The names that I like somehow either it doesn't match with the surname or someone I know already has it.

We started catering today. Got tired of planning what to cook and the hassle of buying groceries here and there. One day I will drive to Tesco or Carrefour to get the chicken, and the next day will drive to the market to get vegetables. If I want organic, have to go to Jusco (cheaper).
Three adults rate is RM400 per month. Today's portion was rather small and disappointing. Will see how it goes tomorrow. I just hope they didn't mistaken that I paid for 2 people instead of 3!

Still so many things not done yet! Air-cond, water heater, bouncing chair, to sun the mattress, get my breast pump and steriliser back from my sister...i know everything will be left to the last minute. As usual!


Ps: My sisters treated me to Delicious today at One U. Second time there. Food tasty but rather pricey. Iris got me a baby monitor from HK... nice. So cheap RM120! And I have my first pair of Crocs shoes.

Feeling Guilty!

I committed the ultimate 'sin'...

I ate fried chicken skin!!!!!!!!!

Normally, with KFC, i would put the skin aside knowing of the absolutely high likelihood of the fats clogging up my arteries! But yesterday, when I was having Popeye's Fried Chicken (for the second time)... the first thought that came to my mind was "What the heck!"

It was just freshly fried and the batter was crisp and light. I couldn't resist throwing it away. I took one bite... yummy... then 'whack-ed' the rest of the chicken...!!!

Oh no... i dare not test my cholesterol level after I have given birth! Nevermind lah. I told myself that I would be banned from all these food for the next 2 months...so I might as well indulge a little!

Baking...

Have not been baking much the past months.

All the ingredients are sitting in the fridge. So sometimes, when I am not bitten by the 'lazy' bug, I will suddenly feel like making something.

Had some leftover puff pastry from Christmas time. So decided to make Chicken Pie. I also had some leftover whipping cream that i used for making pasta sauce. So Voila! For an afternoon tea time snack. Simple pie. Nothing fancy. Pies are one of my favourite food and pretty easy to make. Can eat enough la.

I had always wanted to try making muffins... so first attempt in making muffins was not a failure neither was it a success. It just came out somehow quite hard and solid. The butter smell was rather strong too. Next time I have to put less butter.

Next recipe I am looking at is No-bake Oreo Cheesecake. I suppose that would be a treat to myself before my confinement days. Sounds simple... just need to get my tin first.

Baby @ 32 weeks

Went for check up earlier this week.

Yippee hurray! The baby has turned head down! I felt so happy and relieved when the doc told me during the scan. I really hopes she stays down there. Haha. She might decide to 'swim' back up again.

She weights around 2.2kg now. No wonder I feel harder stepping out of bed and getting out of a chair/sofa now. But I still walk very fast. Baby kicks me more. I can feel her more too. Tiny little thuds here and there. No elbow sticking out yet. But sometimes I feel her pushing on my bladder.

Went for J card day in BBT this week. Got some stuff for baby. Not as much as I had planned. They didn't have much variety there. But pretty cheap la after 30% discount. Missed out to get the mosquito net. There were so many people there but we got there early. So it was quite ok shopping. First time for hubby.

I really don't believe that it is only one and a half months more. So near yet so far.

Early morning!

It just turned 7am and the sun is rising now.

I couldn't sleep ever since going to the loo at 6am. Was tossing and turning around in bed. So many things going through my mind. The sound of the air-conditioner whirring was keeping me awake too.

The feeling of boredom. The feeling of depression. The feeling of anxiousness. All rolled into one.

I guess the feeling of boredom is the most la. Probably about 90%? Dunno why. The only feeling of enlightenment that I get is when I spend money. Even that is short-lived. And also when I look at my little boy and seeing his silly antics. Even that is is also short-lived after he starts to annoy me or get me angry.

I look forward to my new life as a mother of two. But also I also realize that it would be a completely ball game than what I have now. So it is like I am trying to juggle with what I am enjoying with life right now as much as possible before the new chapter starts. But the problem is the life that I have right now is boring me already. And in a way, I can't wait for the new chapter to start soon. Am I making much sense? Probably not.

When I go shopping, the shops bore me. I know exactly where are the things and they are the same things at the same place. When I go to the zoo, I still remember the animals as they were 2 years ago when I was there. Yawn! When I go to work, I see the same customers and dispense to them the same medications and we talk about the same things. Yawn! When I eat at my favourite restaurants, I will order the same items on the menu as when I ate there countless times before. Yawn! When I watch Astro, I will flip to the same programs as I watched the day before.

I think Ryan is also bored. He plays with his cars morning, afternoon and night. But he doesn't complain. I asked him whether he finds it fun, he agreed with me. Just spend RM70 on books for him yesterday... just 2 books. One encyclopedia and a phonics book. I gave him a Matchbox car set that I bought a few months ago at a warehouse sale yesterday. That excited him... for awhile.

Today is Sunday. Even planning what to do today is keeping my mind busy. What to eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner? Oh yah, even eating bores me. 'Sian'. Always eat the same stuff for meals.

I really sound like an old woman.

Baby @ 30 weeks

Went to see Dr. Lim for a bi-weekly appointment yesterday.

He said baby is still in a sitting position. Oh no... baby... time is running out for you to turn downwards. If you wait longer, you are getting bigger! (My weight is now 55.5kg)

Heart rate is 160++ bpm and weight is 1.6++ kg.

Doc says everything is developing fine.

I feel happy to hear that. Only thing is I feel baby is not very active and not kicking me much. The doc gave a very straight to the point answer... if baby was not active from the beginning, there is nothing to be of concern. If baby was active in the beginning and NOW the baby is not, then there is something to be worried. OK, doc... I think you are very right!!!

Other than that,
It is getting more difficult to sleep now. Don't lie much flat on my back... so have to lie side ways which is rather uncomfortable especially when the bed is hard.

The weather is still hot as a desert. Today was the worst kind of heat EVER!

Finally bought my Nutella spread coz i had the craving. Now that i have it, I find it too sweet!

Good night, baby. Good night, Ryan! Good night, hubby!

(Today is the anniversary when my hubby and I first met in Seremban over a makan session with friends in 2001. I normally don't keep track of the dates... even my wedding anniversary I normally forget. Anyway, hubs came home with a stalk of lily. I was surprised. It was a nice gesture for him to take the trouble. But I told him for the price of the flower, a dinner treat would be more worth it. But that was before I knew what was the reason he bought the flower for.)

Lazy day!

Today i feel lazy.

Totally lazy! My entire head is in a blur right now. Also abit moody. Pregnancy blues i guess.

I should be glad that its FRIDAY! What's the diff? I am working tomorrow. For me, the days don't matter. I only dislike working on a Monday.

Have so many plans in my head about what to do today. Go to Jusco. Cook noodles for lunch for Ryan and I. Want to make potato curry puff. Want to make raisin butter cupcakes. Want to surf the net. Want to blog.

That is the problem. I plan so much but at the end, I probably won't execute any of those plans.

I will probably use all my energy screaming at Ryan for misbehaving himself. I do find it that if you remain calm with the naughty toddler, things are easier to be achieved!

(Baby and I weight 54.5kg now)

(I can't believe that American Idol is down to its Final 6 already!!! How time flies!!!)

Hot! Hot! Hot!

Wow.. i cannot describe the intensity of the sun for the past few days!
Never seen such a roaring angry sun. Why so blazing hot, Mr Sun?
My son can't go out to the playground or even take his evening walks now.
We have to switch on the air-conditioner for a longer period. There goes our electricity bill!
Hubby and I contemplating to get an air-cond for the downstairs living room. But very very expensive. Almost RM2500++ with inverter.
There goes a nice cool living room to watch tv. Too many expenses already plus for the months to come.
Even the air-cond in my room is not cold anymore with this scorching heat.

Hope rain will visit us soon....

The attack of the cockroaches!

For the past 2 months or so, I have noticed these tiny little cockroaches in my kitchen.
I ABSOLUTELY loathe cockroaches. They are my no.1 enemy!!! They only come out at night after we all switch off the lights. So when I go to the kitchen at night, I will normally see one or two on the floor or on the kitchen counter. BAM! I will try to hit them. But lately, I have noticed more and they have gotten bigger! Horror! Horror!

So, sent hubby out immediately the next day to get the round discs that contain cockroach poison.
We put them all over the kitchen on Saturday. Let's see how the progress is. Just saw one big one yesterday night!

Sitting position @ 28 weeks

Had a check up yesterday.

I was scheduled for a GTT since i have family history of diabetes. It was quite a torture. I don't remember it being like this when I was pregnant with Ryan. I had to drink this solution which was ultra sweet. Within minutes, I feel giddy. I quickly bought my newspaper and walked back to the lab to sit down. Took my urine and blood sample every hour until the 2nd hour. So I was basically clock watching for the whole 2 hours. The lab assistants kept on asking me whether i wanted to vomit. They shouldn't have asked me so many times. That made me feel like it more. The only thing that kept me focused was having my breakfast after the 2 hours was up!

When I went to see Dr. Lim, he scanned the baby and said that the baby was in a sitting position. That means it is at a breech position @ 28 weeks. He assured me that there is still time for the baby to turn. The baby can turn until maybe 36 weeks. So, I am urging you baby to make a 180 degrees turn soon, ok? Mummy would like to deliver you naturally.

I was actually rather worried with what the doc told me. But I would leave it to God if he wants me to delivery baby vaginally or thru C-sec. Whatever way as long as the baby is safe.

My tummy suddenly looks so big now.
All my clothes are very tight now and only recycle a few most of the time.
I want baby to be more active so I can feel her kicks and thuds. Now its still flutters with occasional kicks.

Baby, 10 more weeks... I cannot wait. But still have alot of work to do to prepare for your arrival. Need a baby cot and get you more baby clothes. Your kor kor Ryan's clothes are all out of shape and yellow already.Need to get an air-cond for the baby room and a heater for the guestroom toilet.

The weeks and days will surely pass very quickly from now.

My thoughts...

It is 1.15am now . Been reading about my regular blogger Mummies and their kids. Haven't been blog hopping for awhile now already. Interesting.

Humid and hot.

Sweating. My back feels clammy.

Decided to write something before going to bed.

Need to go to the loo. Soon.

Ever since being pregnant, my bladder needs to be emptied so frequently. Eventhough i don't drink a lot of water.

Can't really feel the baby kicking yet. There are ripples and little thuds sometimes. I cant remember when we actually start to feel the baby's elbow poking or when the baby is turning??? Perhaps when the baby gets bigger. Now at almost 7 months, I suppose still has room to move around.

Tomorrow is April's Fool day. Actually today is already the 1st. Time flies so quickly.
Hubby came back late today. Was worried for Ryan that he would get bored as I had to cook dinner from 6.30pm - 7.30pm. Wanted to take him out to ride his bicycle... but he refused.
Aiyah! That boy sure is not sporty or atheletic. Kind of worried. Don't want him to be just a bookworm.

I ate a chocolate today. Pregnant can eat ah? In moderation okay rite?

Too hot. Can't bear it already. Need to go to the air-cond room now.

Good night.

My Tummy

This is how i look at 5 months pregnant.

Looks pretty small, yah? Everyone from my family to my customers at the pharmacy to the makcik at the nasi campur stall exclaims that my stomach is small. Some say I don't look pregnant at all!

But from the scans, the baby is growing according to the months when measured.

Now, at 6 months, I feel it is very round and protruding now. I am tired of my old pregnant clothes and want to get some more. Then again,I will only be wearing them for another 3 months more only.

My diet has been very bad the past few weeks. I ate ham! I know I shouldn't but cannot tahan already. Just a few slices! Bad Mummy!

My Birthday Boy

Beginner in Baking

Since December, I got a new Elba electric oven. It is about 36L i think. Didn't want one that was too small or too big. Just a basic one that could roast, grill and bake.

What have I cooked/baked with that oven so far?

First attempt ever in baking...Chocolate chip cookies. I got the recipe from the internet. I wanted something simple and didn't require too many complicated ingredients.
Outcome: Eeerr, it did smell abit burn and brown. And sweet too. But hubby said OK. As long as it is edible. Gave some to my colleagues too. Their feedback was it was too sweet too.

One month later, I wanted to try cupcakes. So I made just a simple butter cupcake recipe where I improvised and added raisins. Ryan loves raisins!


It was rather exhilirating putting the ingredients together and mixing them in the bowl.
Fun to see the cupcakes starting to rise too.

The finished product...

I know. They look 'small' and 'oily'. Actually, they were. I don't know why they were so oily. I didn't add much butter. Why they didn't feel the whole paper cup and rise to the top... I didn't know how much these cupcakes would rise...so I only filled them half way. Beginner!

Last week, I had craving for marble chocolate cupcake.

I must admit that I didn't follow the recipe closely. And had a few blunders along the way. So, the cupcake was a disaster. It looked like a volcano erupting and the chocolate at the outside started to crack. But they tasted rather nice actually.

What shall be my next project?

Valentine's present

Haha. Hubby finally gave me a Valentine's Day gift after like... 6 years of marriage!

Miracles do happen!!!

It has been an unsaid agreement that we will not celebrate V day as it is rather commercialized and everything is marked up on that day.

Surprise! Surprise! After having our Valentine Dinner ala Bak Kut Teh at our regular place in Subang Jaya ( with Ryan), we had ice cream at McD. I do enjoy all these simple indulgence. I had craving for Choco top ice-cream from McD's for the longest time. It was sheer pleasure just sitting there and sharing my ice-cream with Ryan and hubby had one to himself. Ryan needs to learn how to lick by the way. The way he licks is hilarious!

Anyway, went back home ... and hubby gives me this...

He said he got it the day before. Honestly, I didn't expect him to do anything at all. Well, it's the simple gestures that means the most.

Food Cravings!!!

Just want to jot down the food that I have been consuming during this pregnancy.

The food that I crave is rather different than when I was pregnant with Ryan. During the first pregnancy, I was practically eating Indian food throughout my first trimester. There was an Indian restaurant behind where I worked last time. So, I ate my lunch there almost everyday. I craved for their fried chicken together with poppadums and resam. Oh yummy! I just remembered that I totally hated oyster sauce and anything chinese.

For this second pregnancy, I still don't really like chinese food. The thought and the smell of the oil used in the chinese food especially those 'tai-chou' cooking really makes me sick. But take me to a nice chinese restaurant or those serving dim sum... oh yummy!

What have I been eating during this pregnancy???

- Junk food. I eat hamburgers be it McD or A&W almost once in 2 weeks. But i eat mostly the chicken or fist burgers. More healthy right? But don't worry. I steer clear from the carbonated drinks. Just had a sip so far throughout this 5 months. Couldn't tahan.

- I seem to be having an extra craving for chocolates. Also limit myself. Maybe just a small chunk every few days.

- I make it a point to eat fruits everyday. Well, almost! I stock the house with oranges, apples or papaya regularly. Also good for the bowels.

- Occasionally I want to eat Indian food like tosei and roti canai with dhal. A must! I will ta-pau from the mamak behind my pharmacy for tea whenever I work. I yearn for Malay food once in a while.

- The past few weeks I have this great craving for Nasi Lemak. But I try to limit to once in 2 weeks. Not sure the sotong that they use is actually good coz I am sure it is treated with some kind of chemicals.

- My breakfast consists of 1-2 slices of bread and a bowl of cereal/ muesli. If i am hardworking, I will throw in a cup of yoghurt which I am not really fond of. I will normally put jam and peanut butter, kaya or marmite on my bread. And a cup of Milo since coffee is off limits!!!

- I drink just plain water and fruit juices everyday. During my morning sickness period, I couldn't stand the taste of plain water. So I drank Ribena everyday for the first 2 months. Now, I don't even want to touch the Ribena.

It is always the case when it is not the first pregnancy. First time Mummies are normally MORE careful with their diet and follow the guidelines more closely. Now with my second baby, I don't follow the guidelines at all although I stay away from those really forbidden food. Food with preservatives like fish balls or processed food like sausages are also a no no to me. Only eat them in utter limitation.

I know I should be drinking more soymilk, yoghurt and cheeses that will give me more protein and calcium. Fish is also very low in my diet. Those are food that I should be consuming more.

Baby @ 5 months

I can't believe I am already in the middle of my 2nd trimester. It is true. Time really speeds up during this trimester. In the 1st trimester, I was practically counting the days and weeks and wished that I would get through the quesy period fast.

Had an appointment with the gynae Dr. Lim last week. It was a scheduled detailed scan. Hubby and I was pretty excited and nervous. After doing the blood test during the last visit, doc said that I had low risk of Down's syndrome for the baby and the blood test that I did was negative for certain criterias that he was checking. Hurray! The scan took about 10 minutes. Ryan was in the room too. He was getting restless while Papa was trying to hold him back. Everything looked fine and Dr. Lim said the baby is developing well. A huge burden was lifted off my shoulders.

Weigt now= 50kg

Another worry that set us back last week was about the confinement lady. We procrastinated in asking my last confinement lady that took care of Ryan last time...so when I saw her last weekend, it was too late. She said she was already booked! I was very disappointed and suddenly worried whether we could get a reliable pui-yit so last minute. We called so many contacts but all were either booked or no longer working anymore. Thank goodness after a few days of searching, we found one from Seremban who used to take care of my brother-in-law's children.

I can feel the baby kick now. Or maybe more like moving as baby is getting bigger. I should have taken measurements of my tummy over the months. I look more pregnant now. I was getting remarks last time like " Ah.. can't see that you are pregnant!" or " Your stomach is so small!"
After the 3 months, I felt very very energetic and was in the mood of cleaning the house and keeping it spic and span. Now, that hardworking streak is slowly dying down now. This week, I feel slightly more lazy. But still energetic. The house is getting messy again. More lecture from hubby.

Ryan likes to say "Hello,baby!" to my stomach. It is so cute. He will be waving to my stomach while saying that.

Update on my pregnancy

Appointment for baby in 2 days time. Excited. But probably too early to see the sex of the baby. This is the 4th month appointment.

How do I feel now?

- Stomach much bigger now. I can't wear almost all my old clothes now. The pants and shorts. I had to buy a new pants from Seed Maternity and a soft three quarter pants from 9 Months. For the tops, there are a lot of baby doll clothes from normal clothes shops which are much nicer than the tops found in the maternity clothes shops.

- My morning sickness vanished during my 2nd to 3rd month of pregnany. Now my appetite is back to normal. Have not increased yet though. Weight is increasing very slowly. Last month on the 17th of Dec at the doc appointment, my weight was 49.5kg. I still look skinny.

- Feel more tired easily. And I get breathless after doing some light housework like sweeping/mopping the floor. Sometimes the breathlessness can get quite bad. But gets better after drinking some water.

- Can't stand too long. I get cramp from my left buttocks down to my left thigh. Now every night hubby have to massage my leg before we go to sleep.

Other than all the above, I feel good. Ryan keeps on telling me "Inside Mummy stomach got baby!" He likes to jump on me and want to jump on my stomach. I have to keep on telling him to stay away.

The maid that came and left

We were asked whether we would like to have a maid by my sister in law a week ago. It was her MIL's maid but things were not going so well between the MIL and the maid. Apparently the maid was ok and hardworking.

We were only planning to get a maid when the baby arrives. But since this maid was recommended by my SIL and we had a chance to let her work with us for one week, we thought "Why not give it a try first?"

So we went down to Seremban last weekend to take her home. Her name was Ati. I thought she looked pleasant.

Hubby and I was half nervous and excited having a maid.Most importantly was that she had to be good with Ryan and not seem to have an attitude. During the first day at home, I felt a bit lost not knowing how to delegate work to Ati. I was so used doing work myself and now having someone to do the work for you was strange. It took some getting used to.

Looking after her welfare was something I had to get used to. Her food, her basic needs, whether she was getting enough sleep...
First day, I took her to Jusco to buy Cintan Instant Noodles and shampoo. It was in a way fun too taking care of some else.

After a few days, I got used to having her around. It was nice having the floors squeeky clean and sparkling. The kitchen was neat and clean and the windows dust free. She was pretty capable in the kitchen too. She helped me cook the meals and prepare the ingredients.

But on the 3rd day, she told me she heard a voice like a child voice calling her name in the middle of the night. That really freaked me out. I was more worried about her mental stability. And how it progress over the months. Hubby was also freaked out. So we decided to send her back.

I was really disturbed with the decision as she was a good worker. Did we over-react? Were we acting too hasty? After much thought and advice from other people, I decided that I wanted her to stay. Hubby also agreed with my decision.

I thought everything was going smoothly and that we would keep Ati. Then on Saturday, I got a call from my hubby at work and he said that we had to send the maid back. Apparently, the agency's terms were really unreasonable and it seemed like they were cheating us. We were not entitled for the probation period for this maid and the agency was deducting 3 months from the 2 year contract if we were to employ her.

To cut the long story short, the agent came on Sunday morning to take Ati back. I was really distraught and cried myself to sleep the night before and also in the middle of the night. I felt bad and guilty to let her go the way she did. She did not know we were sending her back until the very moment when the agent came that day.

It has been 2 days since she was sent back. But the guilt has been 'eating' me eversince. I do miss her too. She was pleasant and sweet. But majority of people have advised me that maids always seem hardworking and obedient in the beginning but after working for sometime, the trouble normally starts.

I guess I am not experienced in having a maid. And I get emotional and attached very quickly. Maybe it is a sign that I am not ready to have a maid yet. We still need to make the decision quick before the baby arrives in July as it takes about 4-5 months to apply for a maid.